Pregnancy Is A Strange Business

Being pregnant for the second time is very different.

Let me explain..Although I left it quite late at the ripe old age of 36, to have my first I was still mainly surrounded by childless singles. I suppose thats what happens in the London media industry, young or living a life of Peter Pan denying age would ever catch up.

So when I found out I was pregnant I was the first amongst my peers, and my journey was very much filled with naive excitement. Although I looked at all the possible scenarios, googled the worst that could happen, I didn't really think about it too much.

Fast forward nearly 3 years, that bit older, that much wiser and surrounded with many mums I seem to be exposed to different lifestyles and different life stories.

For example my best friend after many years of trying is nearly due with her second IVF baby, her first is 3 years old. There is absolutely nothing wrong with either parent, mysteriously they just cannot conceive naturally. Then there's a mum friend who so sadly is on her 7th miscarriage in the past year, once again for unknown reasons. And the saddest of all, and this rips my heart out, my neighbour, who tried for many years for a baby, finally with elation she conceived but cruelly and tragically was still denied a baby as she had a miscarried at 38 weeks due to a placenta problem.

These stories sent shockwaves through our household. Scenarios we never even thought of before were unfolding in front of our eyes. It just seemed that making a baby was more complicated than ever.

So at 15 weeks pregnant we are currently waiting for my blood results after our 12 week scan. We then have the nerve-wracking 20 week scan where they check for all sorts of abnormalities. I might add for my first, the 20 week scan was purely to find out the gender, I didn't even think about all the other checks which had to take place (personally I think this was a better way to be!) so for the first time ever I'm actually quite nervous.  Of course I have to think on the positive side and I have to remind myself I am already blessed with one very happy healthy toddler. However, by being close to these people, these stories have become real, they are no longer 'a friend of a friend'  they are a stark reminder of how delicate and precious life is and how making a baby is not to be taken for granted.

I might have experienced the worst morning sickness ever, and the sleepless nights have already kicked in.  But when my body is performing such an amazing task, should I expect anything less? Making a baby is a privilege, it's not a right and it certainly is no easy task. Of course I'm trying not to worry, however there is a long journey ahead, so now I feel humble and I plan to take it one day at a time.